Tomorrow....Tomorrow.....

Tomorrow...

That has been the word I have been saying a lot recently...

Tomorrow, I will do the laundry..

Tomorrow, I will take down the tree...

Tomorrow I will ...fill in the blank...

I have had a week of "tomorrows" and yet I still cant bring myself to actually do anything that I said I would do the day before.

Unfortunately I have run out of "tomorrows" for Tomorrow I HAVE to be productive. A week ago, I set myself a date to go back to work (to return to a normal schedule for my family) and tomorrow that date will actually arrive. So thankful that I work from my home, so its not as If I have to be up and out the door facing the world tomorrow.

It will be hard to get back in to a routine, but it is something that needs to be done, not only for me but for the rest of my family.

Yesterday was a hard day, We sat, surrounded by our close friends and family, and celebrated our Beautiful Mother and the wonderful life she lived. On Tuesday, my sisters and I, and our families, will meet at Camp Butler to say our final farewell to her. To say that I'm dreading that day, will be an understatement....Saturday was extremely hard, but leaving Camp Butler will be even harder.

I know that my mom is not in that casket, that I wont be leaving "her" there...I know that she is at rest in heaven. But a part of her is there....the hands that I held for last few days of her life....the face I kissed and the body I hugged....that is still there.

That is why it will be hard to leave....but I will get through it.

So Tomorrow, I will start my day early ( no more sleeping till noon for me), I will make a list and try to complete it, and I will love my family more then ever before.

And on Tuesday....I will cry and say my last good bye...I will watch as my daughter, nephews and nieces, release yellow (moms favorite color) balloons up to the sky, carrying notes up to Heaven, and I WILL remember where my mom truly is.

And I will find my strength where I always do....in my Faith and in my Family.

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