Making Time 4 Home

What is Faith? Picture from Indian Jones and the last Crusades Is it leaping blindly into the abyss, praying for an Indian Jones kind of moment? Or is it resting quietly in the knowledge that God is in control? Faith to me is finding that balance between leaping and resting. I know God is in control and that our steps are ordered by Him....but I also know that sometimes he asks us to leap....to trust that His will is perfect, EVEN when what "we" can see is less then perfect. There have been many times that I have cried out to God, begging Him to give me direction, only to be answered, and then not like what Gods path/direction looked like for my life. He was asking me to take a leap, He knew that the path he had chose for me looked hard and a little unpleasant. But, he also knew where that path would lead me. He knew that the ups and downs on that path, were going to be hard, but that each one would make me stronger, more capable of handling similar situations ...

http://www.andreareiser.com/category/quote/  Feeling Thankful is a choice. With everything that has gone on in the last few weeks, I have not been feeling very thankful, so this morning I decided to write out EVERYTHING I was thankful for. This way, when I am not feeling thankful,I can look back at my list and remember that no matter where I am, I have a reason to be thankful. I am thankful for...... My Family- I truly have the best family ever. a beautiful daughter who makes my heart smile, and a hubby who loves me and puts up with my craziness! I am also blessed with 2 sisters and their families ( I have 5 nieces, and 2 nephews), and I have had the Best parents ever. Mom is still with us and for that I am extremely thankful, and my awesome Daddy has left this world, for his heavenly home. My friends- The last few years I have been praying that God would send me friends, not just people I like, but people I love and want to spend time with.  He answered that pra...

 I was looking through an old file and this popped up. I wrote this a few years ago, when I was really struggling with what I was bringing into my home, and what I was allowing to take my focus away from my family, and more importantly, what I was allowing to take my focus off of God. Have you ever looked at someone and wished you could be like them?   Or thought “if only I looked like them, made as much money, had a huge house, etc?" I sure have! I don’t need a lot of money, but I would LOVE to live in a big beautiful home. I love our home, but I  would prefer that it was a little bigger and nicer from time to time.  I also have a very bad “habit” of wanting to live like those I see on my favorite tv shows. Deep in the recesses of my mind I know that it is all fiction, but how many of us have finished watching an episode of our favorite show, and thought “if only….?” If only my hair looked that good.. If only I was that thin, I could.......

Why? This has been the question that I have been struggling with for the last few weeks. Why us? Why again? Why would you allow us to walk through this again, so soon. WHY...Why....why... every night, I lay in bed, the house dark and silent, and ask this question over and over again. and every night I drift off to sleep without an answer. or at least, not the answer I want to hear. My mother gave me a scripture that someone gave her...not going to lie I was expecting a "pick up your bed and walk" kind of scripture. Instead I opened her very loved bible to Hebrews 10:35 and read. "Cast not away therefore your confidence, which hath great recompence of reward" I looked up in to my moms smiling face and wanted to cry. This scripture said nothing of healing!!  My Mom just smiled and said "Its not about my healing, its about my reward, and what I have to look forward to." I hope that one day I can have her Peace. The peace that ...

Our day started off like any other day.....me rolling out of bed as my dear husband yelling "get out of bed, I'm going to be late for work!" As I run to my daughters room, throwing clothes on and searching for my keys at the same time, I realize that I can only find one shoe....seriously people, how on earth does a 35 year old lose one shoe!!! isn't that something a toddler does??? we finally make it out the door and into the car (with me barefoot) and drop the hubby off for work with 3 minutes to spare ( yay), make my way home and rush around and start to get my daughter dressed and ready for the day! We were supposed to be out the door by 9am, and on our way to see my mom  in St. Peters, HOWEVER......9am comes and goes, 9:15..... 9:20..... 9:30 and we are finally walking out the door!! In the rush of sleeping late, and running around like a mad women, chasing her little crazy chick around the house, I forgot to feed us......Thank God for Mcdonalds!...

Grief comes in stages.....denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Seems like there would be a lot more for something that impacts our life so much, but no, there are only five stages. When my father passed away (2 years in December) I started with denial, skipped anger (that came later), and went straight to bargaining. I prayed...I BEGGED...and I bargained with God to save my father. As the days we spent in the ICU turned to weeks, and my fathers pain increased, we knew that he was only going to be with us a little while longer. I knew what was coming,That he was dying, and that it was what was best for him, but I never accepted that I knew that! It felt so wrong to say "hes going to a better place" or "I know its his time". It felt like I was giving up on him, no longer praying for his healing, but that God would ease his pain and take him gently to the other side. I felt like I was abandoning  him. Not that he was alone,...

I blinked….that’s  all I did, nothing special……just a blink. And 10 years were GONE! My baby who was so small and helpless is now a beautiful little girl, so curious about the world around her. Wanting to try everything (except food) new! She wants to explore, to help others, to be something great! And all I want her to do, is sit on my lap and let me hold her for just one minute longer, to whisper I love you and hear her sweet voice say it back to me. I want to re-watch every moment of her life…to be able to see her learn to walk, hear her 1 st words again, to just be able to recapture her early years! While I know that what I want is unattainable, I am realizing that it will happen again all too soon.   I will blink and she will be graduating high school, learning to drive, finding love, getting married, and having her own family.  It’s all just a Blink away! I can’t change it, no matter how hard I try. What I can change is ...